Category: Blog

Here it is! The official update on the Poetry Book!

The first batch has finally shipped out to us, and we will be filling orders ASAP. I will reopen orders until the first edition sells out, and then they will be discontinued.

Ordering reopens on October 10th at 11 am Central Time!

This book holds a special significance for me because it relates to my own experience of the dark night of the soul. Originally, I was just using poems that I had written over the years, but I ended up writing new ones in addition to the ones I already had ready to go. The journey started when my friend Drew passed away. Drew said key things to me in my life from the years 2009 to 2012 that stayed with me long after their death. There were pivotal moments in my dark night when Drew’s red-lettered words came into play.

The night before Drew passed away, I had a dream that we met in a cave we used to do photoshoots in from time to time.

The lighting was so bad. At times, things were distorted. I couldn’t see myself.

We talked about life, but when it was time to go, Drew said,

“I’m staying here. If you need me, I’ll be here.”

When I went through a Dark Night of the Soul… I entered that cave. You didn’t fail me. You were there.

Some of these poems and thoughts are very “off” if you know me, but my journey was riddled with emotions and demons I had never faced before. Understanding that would not have been known if I had not entered the night.

I see a light at the end of the tunnel, but some days I am sure I will not make it through to the other side. This is the story of how I fell into the darkness. My descent isn’t pretty, but I hope to help others who have found themselves in a similar situation. I hope to draw strength from my hardships and find myself again. I hope that I can give back again when I am replenished. Giving and loving are all we are here for. I am waiting for my chance to be that person again, but the well has been so dry. I am grateful to everyone who has stood by my side in support of me personally and EPJ. It means more than it ever did.

Thank you for being here through this journey with me and EPJ.

Monthly posts will be back on the website blogs starting this Fall!

We are back on TikTok and posting again regularly on IG and FB! We still post every Saturday on Patreon with at least seven weekly series posts and updates.

Here are our links:

Patreon:
patreon.com/Evil_Pawn_Jewelry

Instagram:
instagram.com/Evil_Pawn_Jewelry

Facebook:
facebook.com/EvilPawnJewelry

TikTok:
tiktok.com/@Evil_Pawn_Jewelry

Thank you for keeping up with us!

Remember, as always for 22 years now, we ship weekly.
The rule: If you order this week, it ships the following week.

All of our love! And Many Bright Blessings!

The Veda Necklaces and the Juno Rings in Rhodonite are available on the website! I am so in awe of these beautiful plush pink tones!

The Veda Necklace can be found here:
https://evilpawnjewelry.com/shop/necklaces/veda-necklace-in-rhodonite/

The Juno Ring can be found here:
https://evilpawnjewelry.com/shop/rings/juno-ring-in-rhodonite/

These magical chunks were considered high quality, but I do not get into grading systems because I feel like all crystals are relevant. The stone should always call to you, and the grade is always an afterthought. Trust your instincts. If this palette of plush pinks calls to you… the calm tranquility of Rhodonite awaits.

This Rhodonite has that sought-after plush pink color that is found in these grades. Again, I love all qualities of gems and am drawn to all needed gem energy.

“Rhodonite, being a Level Five, is a friend, shield, protector, and blanket from the cold. Piny The Elder described it as ‘The lifeblood of the Rose.’ This crystal is that feeling in your heart and blood when you hear that song that gives life. It is that first feeling of new love. It is the excitement on the morning your vacation starts. It literally is the energy labeled as ‘Gives Life.’”

You will most likely see a lot of talk about Rhodonite having to do with fire. This is somewhat true in personality but needs to be detailed. Rhodonite is an Earth Crystal with added Fire traits to its persona. There are also thin attributes of water. This is because of the slow fire and a slow-running stream vibe. Rhodonite is Patience. Calm, ease, slow-moving. Patience and that slow burn are needed right now. “Gradually. Always Gradually,” says Rhodonite. Slow-burning fire next to an easy-flowing river. Rhodonite offers balance on wobbly ground and alignment when we are mentally off. That new gradual joy that gives life.

For more about Rhodonite, crystal meanings, and Crystal Levels, check out EPJ’s Patreon!
www.Patreon.com/Evil_Pawn_Jewelry

For the Crystal Familiar Book One, please see this link:
https://evilpawnjewelry.com/shop/books/public-crystal-familiar-book-one-pre-order/

Thank you so much for reading EPJ’s blog! Many Bright Blessings!

I am beyond broken. My darling Nicodemus has crossed the Rainbow Bridge. I cannot really imagine how I will navigate this world without him.

When they sedated him, suddenly, it began to snow. When he left, it stopped. We wrapped him up for his burial, and the sun came out. The rays shined down right on him and the table he was lying on. He seemed to glow. I have never believed in coincidence, even as a child. It all has purpose, in order to give purpose. It is all about our becoming. Nothing comes without struggle and pain. Too many seek only pleasure and the endless loop of the pleasure principle. The dullest of lives are painless. Without the sharp edges, life has no point. 
Pointless. Lifeless.
Without the shadow, the sketch is just a blank page. 
Blank. Lifeless.

When I look out the window, I keep thinking I see him coming home from his grave. I also see him through the corner of my eye at every turn. As I have always said, self-destruction is so alluring. Don’t you think? 

I replay his call, “Come see me… come find me,” and he would come running. Now only a blank space.

I keep thinking of his fur markings, in fear I will forget. I can’t wash my clothes from the last time I held him.

I closed my eyes and saw Freyja pick him up. He got into her chariot, and she flew away. He went to the back and watched me as he went into the clouds. Like a child in the back of a car window. Eyes that wave goodbye.

We are all physical manifestations of our soul’s stage, and animals are no different. We must never differentiate animals from ourselves and our own personal selves from each other.

I was sure the point of conjure to my inner death took place eons ago on some star far from the beginning of this place. It must have resurrected somewhere in the space of time from then to now because I felt myself die inside when he took his last breath. Yet existence continues on, screaming into the sleeping ear of an elder god. I am not disillusioned about death and the need for it. I know that his energy is still here and that all lives on after the shedding of the mortal coil. It’s just an egotistical primitive echo to want all things to stay and all things to stay the same. But the only constant is change. Again existence spirals on. 

Death is not the end. It is only a door. Where ever the door opens to… my dear Nicodemus… “Come find me.” 

Nicodemus Furman TigerMan Platypus Papayas Cantrell
2005 (vet birth year estimation) – March 17th, 2023. 

Most of you know that I am a cultivator of dreams. Most of my friends have had to endure long speeches of encouragement for all the things they want to accomplish. The more they think it’s impossible, the more I brainstorm possibilities for it. I’ve made full-on outlines and written up business plans for people because I believe that when people dream greatness for themselves, our world arrives on a shore of plenty.

I have always been told that I am a bit of a dreamer, and I am ok with that. There was a time when all of my hoped personal and business accomplishments were an eye roll in another person’s head. Let them have their opinions and continue on, my friends.

My little company will celebrate its 20-year anniversary next month, I somehow released another book, and I have a great family and some seriously amazing friends. Family and true friends are all that really matter in the end, but cultivating them into your own dream and you in theirs is key to manifesting full expansion.

So friends, here I am. Ready to give you the lecture, aka pep talk.


I am not asking you to make a New Year’s Resolution. I am asking you to resolve daily. Hourly. In every present moment. This life is pointless if we do not give it a point. It doesn’t matter how much money you make or what you accumulate. What matters are those little sparks of life that explode within your being when you are doing something that gives you life. Your dreams, hobbies, hopes, wishes, all of it. Even if you can only accomplish this thing on the weekends, you must do it. It is the magic that gives you life.

Negative people will find all kinds of things wrong with this, and some people will be entirely offended that I suggest dreaming in a world that seems so dark. Some will list their rebuttals in the comments, like warfare bullets, and delete me from their world.

This is because we all find arguments from our own dysfunction. We all find ways to kill someone else’s light from our own dysfunction. We kill our own light with our own dysfunction.

In a world of war, constant bitterness, polarity, and death… we must dream. We must teach children to dream. We must calm the sea and put the whole world to sleep for a while. Human beings are creators, and this world makes it hard for many to dream.

It is time to realize yourself and not argue against the things you want. It is time to stop telling others they can’t dream. It is time to tell everyone you know that you believe in them. It is time to tell yourself that you believe in yourself. Remember what this place is, my dear friends. It’s all just a dream, so dream big. Let it spill into your waking life. You’ll never be tired again.

A few years ago, I was reading about an Iron Age grave with my friend Mia. Within this burial site, there was one that sparked the most interest, it was named The Woman from Himlingøje.

The woman was thought to be a Chieftess or someone of high-ranking authority. Her Earl Rings were a giveaway to this notion, along with the abundant treasures that were buried with her. Green Roman glass, earthly pottery, and bright yellow gold.

Her rings caught my eye, I loved how one Earl Ring had three connected stacks, and the other had two connected stacks. The snakes on her rings were very much like the Iron Age style of Jörmungandr. I loved it, but I was inspired to make my own version. Not just in memory of all the forgotten Chieftess of the old world but all of the forgotten Snake Goddesses that seem to go hand in hand with them.

I wanted the snakes to curve around the finger but still be seen from the top. If you are on my Patreon page, you definitely saw the many trial and errors of that. It wasn’t as easy as I thought it would be. I have never had more scraped wax molds on any other project.

After so much time thinking about it and working on this project, their manifestation seems to be that of many, many years ago. Instead, we are coming upon three years. Maybe because it is so familiar, the same queens and their snake companions, over and over again.

Let them not be forgotten, to all the Queens, Goddesses, and Common Women of the magical old world. And to all of the serpent guides that found them.

The Drottning Triplet Serpent Rings can be found here:
https://evilpawnjewelry.com/shop/rings/drottning-triplet-serpent-rings/

The Drottning Twin Serpent Rings can be found here:
https://evilpawnjewelry.com/shop/rings/drottning-twin-serpent-rings/

Thank you for all of your love and support!

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We receive messages about Skull Babies daily. They have been off the website since last October, and the main reason was that I was so severely behind. The waitlist was way too long. I am currently just starting to finish up the orders from last October. (Yes, there were that many, and I was that behind) 

Once the website orders are complete, I have a few custom Skull Babies that are in preparation and one that is my besties baby (yes, I am even behind on my besties skull baby)  

I love making them and wondered if I should just make them and then place them on the website. Many of you commented on those posts when I asked for your opinions about how to proceed with them, and I appreciate the feedback.

The main issue is when they get behind, or even if I am in a good place with them… (most people are very patient, some never email in, and some check in once. or twice, no biggie), but there are usually some that are not patient at all. I have had customers email once a week and sometimes more asking when their Skullbaby will be ready. Sometimes bullying a completion date from us. It makes it very stressful. Especially if it isn’t ready by the estimated completion date. A lot of calculation goes into them, and I don’t want to shortcut any of the steps because that is not how I designed them to be created.

I know some people do not care, but I make them with planetary guidance and the movements of the moon. There are certain cycles I refuse to work on them under. I use numerology based on the customer’s name, and every drop of water used in the making of the piece is a moonwater collection. There are so many people that think this is pointless and that do not follow these things; that is ok but realize that some people do. This is how I make them. I refuse to just make them. They are layered and time collected.

So I decided to have a ready version available every other month or so. For customers that want one but do not like the wait. Then I plan on having them on the website again as before to order as a “made when ordered” item. Also, the new Skullbabies will be relaunched in just a few months (after I am completely finished with everyone who has been waiting) The new Skullybabies, or Skullbaby T-5000 as we have been calling them around here, will have a new design and will be available in a necklace and ring selection. I have not decided if I will let custom add-ons be a part of this new release or not. I will keep you posted.

Thank you so much for all of your kind emails and kind comments about this subject.

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The last Goddess of the Collection Two Coin Necklaces has been released! This Goddess is for all animal lovers! 

One of the oldest Goddesses known, Potnia Theròn. Known as the Queen of the Animal Kingdom, her name literally translates to “The Animal Queen.” She kept the fine balance of the animal ecosystem in check. Any imbalance was dealt with swiftly by her powerful hand. She is the one we turn to for help with sick animals, unjust cruelty to animals, and aid in their environment. Re-invoking her ancient name in this new world will empower her cause. Let’s face it, my dear friends, we need it. We need it to advance to the next level. Humans are no longer in the dark ages. Our fur and scale friends need love, care, and a planet that is equally their home too. Potnia Theròn shows us the truth, they are a part of us more than we ever will understand. She has many names and is considered one of the ancient elder gods. A force of nature. 

Her crystal is a protective Smoky Quartz. 

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Thank you to the stars of this project, her contributors: 

Giulia Costanza – Anthropology student, Contributor

Jennifer Kazan – Cultural Anthropologist, Contributor

Gratitude and love to all healthcare providers! The first known Goddess of healing and patroness of doctors, nurses, healing arts, and medical practices. Gula was the first caregiver, an aspect of every Goddess and every human. She was considered a divine physician, showing us that the power to heal is knowledge of the body and healthcare. She not only helped heal but showed humans how to heal the body. The power to heal is within us all, but there are some who choose to shine highly in this facet. Making the healing arts their chosen profession. Gula was known as “The Great Doctoress” and the first of this profession. Later being turned into a Male God or blatantly replaced by other newer Male Gods of Medicine in surrounding regions… still Gula was not fully erased. 

The Patroness of the Healing Arts and Medical Practitioners is experiencing a revival. Her magic comes with less mystery and more text. Humans are just rediscovering her powerful teachings. 

Her crystal is a healing Clear Quartz. 

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Thank you to the stars to her contributors: 

BahArak Shah – Historic Archeologist, Contributor. 

Zara Hadid – Cultural Anthropologist, Contributor. 

Aleah Yousefi Andrews – Masters in Middle Eastern Studies with an emphasis on societies and cultures, Contributor.

Charlene Garibay Diaz – Muse, Friend, Healer, Goddess enthusiast, Contributor of inspiration

“You must destroy to create. In time, all endures both, for infinity.”

Kali is the ultimate reality and manifestation of Shakti. She is the Mother of all beings and the ultimate Mast of Time. As energy changes and cycles through lives, it is moved by her hand. She is the force of time. The creator and the destroyer. 

Kali is the governess of a sect of Figure Magick known as Blood Magick. She is the supreme goddess of the many sects of Fire Magick. The universe bends to her gaze. She is the Mother that takes your hand and guides you through the sea of monsters. Change can be scary and as the force of change, she is also a protector in its whirlwind. A most powerful Goddess indeed. 

Her crystals are Onyx, Smoky Quartz, Carnelian, and Obsidian. 

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Priya Singh – BD in Ancient Indian History, Culture, and Archaeology Studies, Contributor

Kerrie Sharma-Glad – Writer, South Asian Historian, and Scholar, Contributor

Tamera Silva – Muse, friend, contributor of inspiration, A Klatch for this life and the next.